7.25.15 now does not mean tomorrow

"When you complain, you make yourself a victim.

Leave the situation, change the situation, or accept it.

All else is madness."

-Eckhart Tolle-

My sugar-free day today [well, technically yesterday, since it's past midnight] did not go well.

At all.

I thought it was going to be fine, but I made a concious bad choice, and after that I just sort of said 'Ah, fuck it'.

That's always a good way to deal with life, right?

Anyways I was trolling perusing the internet and found a 6ish minute video that was an ex drill sergeant calling out people for, well, basically being fat unhealthy. It was very much a tough-love video. Very much so.

But the moral of the video is that it's unhealthy [duh, we all know this already], and that for many people making excuses for why they are unhealthy/overweight/obese/etc, very few of them are actually legitimate. Mostly people are lazy [not wanting/being too tired to work out, not wanting to take the time to cook healthier meals] and/or have low self-control, specifically when it comes to eating.

[Yeah, I get it, people have thyroid problems. I have had thyroid problems. And when I was diagnosed with them, I still only weighed about 130 pounds. It's less of an excuse than what people want to admit. Also, I have to take fracking steroids right now, thanks to my lovely autoimmune disease, and although this caused me to gain like 20 pounds in one effing month, that doesn't mean I can't change it. I can. It's just "too hard". *eyeroll@myself*]

It sounds harsh, and it is a bit. And I am usually wary of fitness and health "experts" ranting about fat people because, seriously, they we get that enough from scumbags who just want to shit on others.

But strangely enough, his video did not turn me off.

It was actually quite intriguing, to the point that I followed it to his facebook page and read more about him.

Whatever, I'm not going to link it or anything, but you can google it yourself. They guy's name is John Burk.

The main point I took home from the video is that it has to start today.

And I have problems with that.

I'm always like, okay, I'll have this one last day of eating all this crappy crap food that I love just to get the cravings out of my system, and tomorrow I'll start eating baby carrots and drinking 5000 gallons of water per day.

The thing is, tomorrow is always tomorrow.

And so tonight, I decided that is does not start tomorrow [even though it'd be super easy to make that excuse, seeing as it's so late]. It. Starts. Now.

And I've already had to test my willpower once. It only took three hours before my brain was back on the food train.

I went to eat cereal and was literally thinking 'One for the road' as I opened the box...

then stopped and thought about how I was already giving up after three fucking hours? Seriously?

So I closed the box and put it back

and possibly gave myself a congratulatory mental pat on the back.

I need to hold myself accountable.

I need to think of the bigger picture.

I need to remind myself of the longer picture.

Is one minute of having happy taste buds worth feeling uncomfortable and unhealthy and generally shitty the other 1439 minutes in the day?

No. Not even a little bit.

Soooo why would I continue to act like it is?